YONAH•Mourning Dove•Journal

APRIL 2021

YONAHTAUBE.COM - LAUNCHED AT 19.00, Wednesday, 28 April 2021

Thursday 01 April:
A new day of a new month! And both began with the call from the next room as Yonah woke and we both greeted this chilly 1° day. Light, wet snow falling and “warnings” in the forecast of actual snow until 2:00AM on Friday! Another “3-5 inches” of accumulation! “April”... It's supposed to be “April showers to bring May flowers”, not “April snow showers to delay May flowers”... and Yonah's day of returning “home to the flock”! And for the most part, the day was just chilled and damp. 'tis the season. Oh well... she doesn't seem to mind at all, really. The morning hours were FULL of “coo'ing” so she's either “mourning” the loss of her “normal” life and flock or, she's content here, in the warmth, protected from the snow and cold breezes out-side. (How I wish I know which it is!)
But, as it has been through the Winter and remains, Yonah's room is quite warm, toasty, comfy It's a delight to be in the room with her, for the company and for the comfort. I'm SO looking forward to the time when the out-side is as warm and she can be out and about... with her friends, family... flocks.
We spent the day together as I worked on that “presentation” I've posted on my “business” site. Photos, videos, and the coding to make them easier to “search” on-line. And, of course, I took more photos of her, in her window, with the snow falling out-side. (She's getting quite the “album” now. It's nice to know that I can show her progress and her “life” here with others... even around the world. Little “Celeb”.) I worked on it as she alternated between watching over me and taking little snoozes. That too, is such a comfort to my soul, seeing her so relaxed and comfortable that she can actually snooze with me in the same room. How things have changed... for both of us. I worked until the sun began to set and the room darkened.
As the day turned to night, I worked, we listened to music and it came time to be “tucked-in”. The snow stopped for a while, but the winds kicked-up again. All of the photos and pages on her “album” are up to date and ... waters got changed, curtains closed and the “block” against the head-lights on the road out-side was put up. The desk lamp was turned off... and again, tonight, I've put a bit of card-board on the top of her house to add to the “protection” against sudden “flashes” of light as the occasional vehicle comes by in the night. (I remember how against covering her house I was, but, honestly, when I'd started to “cover” it, it truly DID disturb her. I understand why: this “dark mass” suddenly coming through the air. “Predator”! But she seems to not only be accustomed to it but it appears she appreciates it now... it's an indication of “night” and “sleep”. I think, sometimes, it's similar to being in the rafter of an old barn... protection against the rains and winds. Well, indeed, she IS protected, against those and so much more... My “DIVINE BLESSING”.
I WISH I had, at least, a cot in the room... I'd take my snoozes in there during the day... and, who knows... maybe spend some nights... together... whilst we may.

Friday 02 April:
Snow on the mountains, clouds in the sky again today. Crisp breezes blowing too. And a “high” temperature” of 0°. It's April! But the truth of the matter is that I've been lookiing so forward to Yonah being back with her flock that these days get on my nerves. It's almost as if Nature is working against her return for some reason, and the longer it does, the more “adjusted” to this “inside living” she's going to become and my fears of her not being able to adjust to her “normal” life increase. It's certainly NOT that I don't enjoy her company and presence; quite the contrary! I DO SO ADORE HER, and she's been such an EXCELLENT teacher and inspiration. But it really isn't fair, just or correct, that she's in here, in this house this way. Over all though, the fear of her going out there now... THAT causes me even MORE anxieties because she hasn't had the need or opportunity to “adjust” to bitter cold! Never mind, having to trod on snows and ice. Oh... I suppose it's all a matter of “patience”. The day will come... and sooner now than, let's say, in January. “Patience”. Mean-while, she's got LOVE and protection (and “adoration”), and she's MOST welcome to be here as long as it takes.
And, to that point, she's got fresh food, fresh waters to drink and to bathe in, and a clean house... top to bottom, end to end. (“Morning Routine” as it's come to be known because it's the first thing done each and every morning... It's also the last thing done of an evening, to be honest. Yes, twice, minimum, daily... water and paper... clean!)
We DID spend the day together though. I got MORE of her photos onto the “slide” page on the internet as we listened to the like of “Triplettes de Bellville” She seemed to really enjoy it too. And no matter the temperatures out-side, her room was steady at a really cozy 23°. (I'd REALLY like to have a cot, at least, in her room, so I could take my daily “snoozes”, as I do of late, right there. She appears to enjoy it when I'm in the room... “company”, I imagine... and though I'm not really a “good” or even “passable” substitute for a flock, I suppose I'm better than nobody being around. AND, on a selfish level, I'd prefer being with her as much and often as possible. After all... the days and nights will soon warm and... all of this beautiful time with her will become just a memory.)
This evening, at “bed-time”, we spent an hour or more, just chatting, as I do, with the door to her house open. We talked about “things”, the day, the days to come, how much I LOVE her and how I look forward to her being re-united with her flocks. We listened to a bit of music as well and once in a while, I'd sing along with a song and she, sitting on her perch, would stare at me with head tilted, as if trying to understand. AND, AT SOME POINTS, SHE'D COO! A “SING-ALONG”, WITH THE BEST.
There's going to be a VAST VOID in this house when she's no longer in it. A VAST, DARK, COLD VOID.

Saturday 03 April:
This morning, we woke to -4°! Clear skies, and the sun managed to make its way in through Yonah's windows but... MINUS 4! And it didn't really get much warmer as the day progressed. The “GOOD” part of it is that it DOES come through the window with a comforting warmth and Yonah DID get to enjoy that much, basking, as she does, as it passes by.
Being Saturday, I had nothing on the agenda. “No work” on the “Sabbath” but... I DID manage to get more done on a “slide” presentation for Yonah's photos (and that's NOT “work”... that's pure pleasure and joy and, as far as I'm concerned, the perfect way to observe Shabbat: time associated with the most BEAUTIFUL LITTLE CREATION IN ALL OF “CREATION” ANY- AND EVERY-WHERE! And I've finally remembered how to get web pages to “refresh”... advance, as it were! I used to be SO fluent at all of this coding, but the years have taken from memory and the coding protocol has changed. BUT... it's come back! One “glitch”: the back-ground of the photos is black, to make the photos more visible and vivid and as the pages change, there's a “flash of white”. So there's more that I have to try, but the more I do, the more time spent with Yonah because it all takes place under her “supervision” and in her company and THAT is a most beautiful thing. And we even had mid-day tea together today! NOW! THAT'S PERFECTION! An indescribably WONDERFUL time!
And “time”, as it does, passed entirely TOO quickly... I popped-out for daily “meal” and by the time I was done with the washing-up... the sun was disappearing... “time” for 'tuck-in” for the night. So, curtains got closed, primarily against any cold

that would try to come in through the panes of the windows, “covers” against the lights of “people” (head-lights) went up (and too, that block keeps the cold away too so it serves a double purpose), the day was done, the house was quiet, and no matter WHAT the night wanted to throw at us, Yonah and I settled-down... and she has nothing to be concerned with or about except good rest, good health, good healing. All else? I'll make SURE it's there for her... ALWAYS.

Sunday 04 April:
IT WAS ANOTHER MORNING OF -4°! But it DID manage to warm enough so that the front door could be open! FRESH AIR IN THE HOUSE! There's still that “chill”, a “crispness” to the breezes, but what a delightful change, having the door open! (Sadly, there are still the odd nights ahead still have that “minus” in front of the digits, but at least the digits are “single”... “Hope”.)
The day was more working on the photo presentation for Yonah. BUT... I WAS IN THE COMPANY OF A LITTLE BUNDLE OF PRECIOUS, OF LIFE, OF GOODNESS, WRAPPED IN DELIGHTFULLY BEAUTIFUL FEATHERS, AND SHE COO'ED... IN THE MORNING, THE AFTER-NOON AND THROUGH TO THE EVENING! AND WE CHATTED THROUGH THE DAY! I SO HONESTLY LOVE HER WITH EVERY BIT OF MY BEING... AND SOME-HOW I KNOW THAT SHE KNOWS THAT ALL I MEAN FOR, ALL THAT I WANT FOR IS FOR HER TO BE PERFECTLY WELL. I HAVE HER IN MY LIFE, SHE HAS ME, AND WE'RE DOING PRETTY DAMNED WELL... AGAINST SO MANY ODDS.
As I worked, she and I listened to the “PlayList” of her bird songs. She had her breakfast and lunch, I had my morning coffee and mid-day snack. And the sun POURED in through the windows!
I'd stepped out-side to the “Hill” side for a bit and Jeff happened by. We talked about Yonah (right out-side her window). He told of having had a parakeet and he asked what food I have for Yonah. I told him of her “special diet” (nothing but the best) and he smiled and said she's “spoiled” and that I shouldn't be surprised if, when I DO get her back out, she decides she's not leaving. “They know when they've got it good.” And when I told him of her “house” he suggested that, when she goes back to her flock, I should get a parakeet. (No, after Yonah, there will be no “others”. She's been my HEART and SOUL, and, NOBODY could ever take her place. Besides, I'm SO averse to the very notion of “buying” a bird! I find it repulsive that they're even offered for sale! Better to buy a “slave”... or any other sort of human. I won't support the “industry”! And people who do and who keep it running ought to be... well, hanged. My opinion, of course. But, no shame, guilt or apologies should any be insulted.) When I said so, Jeff seemed to understand my position. Hey, maybe I've gotten through to one other person... may the ideal spread.) As we talked, I was aware of being with-in hearing range of Yonah... and I have a feeling she DID hear us out there. (It would be wonderful if she understood. But...)
It did take the day to get the “coding” on the photo pages correct, but, I surely didn't mind. The more I did, the longer Yonah and I were together. It's working now... and I'm pondering a “domain” for her... her own, private web-site. Maybe compiling my learning... maybe a “blog” to document these days with her. I'm pondering. It would be nice. Especially if others find it. They'd get to read and know her story, and with what I've been finding from various sources, I could put it all at “one-stop”. As I say... “Pondering”. Right now, I want the photos on-line so others can see them.
In other “news”, I'm particularly pre-occupied with the shelving for Yonah's place on the back gallery! Today made it all the more in the fore-front of thoughts, now that the door is open ad the air flows through the house again. I DO want to get that done, but, with single-digit nights still to come, not knowing whether or not she'll get right back in with the flock, and the fact that she's not had the chance to “adapt” to any cold at all these past months, AND I need to figure a place where her “house” can remain available to her and safe... I'm anxious, but not in any particular hurry. I want that place, that house to be available to her until such time when SHE decides she doesn't want or need it.
So the night rolls in. It isn't nearly as cold as it's been for what seems a small eternity. It certainly isn't “warm” either, but... And little Yonah is tucked-in, all comfy, safe and secure.

Tomorrow, her curtains get washed. There are some “stains” on them from her past injuries and I'd feel better if those were gone... no need for reminders... for either of us. I see multiple mentions of 15° in the forecast for the next two weeks. (Those are day-time “highs”... not bad... the nights will still be minuses but... the days are warming.) For tonight? We have another together and I have a morning, tomorrow, to hear the “call” when it's time to get up and we “roll”... together... again. These are the “Beautiful Days”... and I'm indescribably grateful for them... each and every one.

Monday 05 April:
Yonah's curtains got a good, thorough washing today. The sun shone, they dried ever-so nicely. At last, clean curtains on the windows! “Spring cleaning”.
This morning, as I changed the water in her pool, I spilled it... IN her house. So the dish had to come out and so, there was thorough house-cleaning as well! Clean curtains, clean house... windows will be next! Her last days (or weeks, at the rate the weather refuses to cooperate) will be in all freshness after a “stale” Winter. It really is something to note that I can take her house apart, get in there with kitchen roll, wiping and cleaning and moving things about and she just “hangs about”, almost “supervising”, noticing the movements, and it's almost as if she's noting where things “were” and where they're put back to. But, there's no indication of an sort of anxiety as I go about it all. For the most part, she just takes my “interference” as “expected”. “Oh, it's just the house-keeping crew again. He'll be gone in short order.” Talk about a difference from the “early days”. Although, she never really did get too excited when I'd clean. (I have to wonder: has she been aware of the fact that I never meant her any harm, even from the beginning? Did it some-how register with her than I brought her in to help, save and protect her? Over these months together, I've come to learn that these little ones aren't all as, let's call it “less intelligent” than humans as we're told to believe. I can't imagine that Yonah's any different from ANY other mourning dove... let alone any other little one. And she's quite BRILLIANT, adaptive, and yes, I will swear that she has some cognition of the fact that I mean her no harm... in fact, I'd swear that she's aware of my affections and intentions. I could spew for days on my observations and disgust with humanity. I could become acerbic, vile, when I think of shooting these little ones... for “sport”? For “fun”? It's a sickness.)
I have to stop at this point... I'm always tempted to literally “write a book”, but nobody will want to read it... nobody'll want to hear it. Suffice to leave it as it is.
As another day came to a close, the whispy clouds turned to mauve, the winds calmed to simple breezes as the last birds out-side chirped their calls to one-another. The mourning doves got tucked-in for the night... those out-side and this one here. And Yonah's curtains are fresh and clean, so too, her house and her room got a deep and thorough Hoovering as well. It was a “good” day. Warm days are ahead, and sun-shine too. We have time together yet... and when all the “chills” are put in the past... well... we'll handle that when we come to it. For tonight... Yonah and I close our doors and curtains to the night and its chill... warm and safe.

Tuesday 06 April:

The Turtle Dove

Fare you well my dear I must be gone
And leave you for a while
If I roam away I'll come back again
Though I roam ten thousand miles, my dear
Though I roam ten thousand miles.
So fair thou art my bonney lass
So deep in love am I.
But I never will prove false to the bonney lass I love
Till the stars fall from the sky my dear
Till the stars fall from the sky.
The sea will never run dry my dear
Nor the rocks never melt with the sun.
But I never will prove false to the bonney lass I love
Till all these things be done my dear
Till all these things be done.
O yonder doth sit that little turtle dove
He doth sit on yonder high tree
A-making a moan for the loss of his love
As I will do for thee my love
As I will do for thee.

Ralph Vaughn Williams

Last night, Theresa had sent an e-mail with this MOST AMAZING SONG: “THE TURTLE DOVE” and it was waiting for me when I went through the morning “internet” as I do of a morning!!! I sat listening to it and SOBBED, WEPT my heart out!!! (And now I have FIVE copies of it, on the lap-top AND on the iPod!) And as I sat in the kitchen, singing along with it, YONAH COO'ed FROM HER ROOM!!! It's as if she enjoys the music, and... maybe she heard me crying as I sang. This evening, when she (Yonah) and I had our “evening chat” I talked about the day, as a whole, as we do, and I mentioned getting her situated on the back gallery, and when I mentioned her flying away... she coo'ed... REPEATEDLY! I can't but help knowing that she “senses” my ambiguity, that I DO, SO VERY MUCH, want her FREE again and yet, it breaks my heart into irreparable pieces thinking of life with-out her. And as I spoke, she stayed on her perch, right inside the open door of her house, looking directly at me for most of the while. My heart... again... “LOVE” and loss. LOVE and loss. Well, I do suppose we'll see how it works out... when...
Meanwhile... it was another sunny and “seasonably warm” day... read: chilly. Saturday is forecast to be 18° during the day and 10° at night! (Of course, on Sunday... rain, and 9° days with 2° nights to follow. Well? I ain't July yet.) But these temperatures are promising and they put the pressure on me to work on Yonah's place on the back gallery!
Last night, before heading to bed, I looked into “shelving”, “commercial”, steel. But I didn't find anything that really pleased me so it looks like I need to get busy... building!) There is some “reasonable” shelving and it's rather “reasonably” priced. I'll have to call around, see where it's available so I can get a good look at it before I decide which way to go with this.
This morning, the “patch”... the “slide” on Bald Peak is still white. It's the last place to hold the Winter snows. I keep watch to see when it clears. It's no “guarantee” of no more snow to come, but it is an indication of warmer weather to come. It would be greatly appreciated if it were to melt... and stay clear rock... Oh... “the suspense”.
Had to step out for a while today, but when I got back... the rest of the day was spent with Yonah! YAY!
SHE'S BEEN SO VOCAL OF LATE! SHE CALLS WHEN I LEAVE THE ROOM AND WHEN SHE FEELS SHE'S ALONE. I SO HOPE SHE DOESN'T BECOME DEPENDENT ON ME! BUT I HAVE TO ADMIT THAT I TRULY AM “IN LOVE WITH HER” AND HOPING SHE'LL DECIDE TO KEEP HER “HOME” FOR THE SUMMER. AND I HOPE SHE'LL HEAD TO WARMER CLIMATES COME THE COLDER WEATHER AND NOT STAY HERE THROUGH THE WINTER. IF SHE DOES DECIDE TO STAY THOUGH... I'M ALREADY PONDERING A “SET-UP” WHERE SHE'LL BE ABLE TO COME TO A WARMER PLACE... NOT MUCH WARMER THAN THE COLD OUT THERE... I DON'T WANT HER TO NOT BE ABLE TO ADAPT, SINCE SHE'LL BE OUT FLYING WITH THE FLOCK, BUT SOME PLACE BETTER PROTECTED AGAINST THE BRUTAL COLD OF WINTER NIGHTS. But this “calling” as I leave and the calling when I'm in other rooms... it concerns me. She HAS developed some degree of “attachment”. It's going to be EXTREMELY difficult, for BOTH of us is it gets any stronger. (At least, if SHE gets as attached to me as I am already to her.)
So it was QUITE the day today and tomorrow claims to be a repeat. Then, Thursday, 19° with a “chill” of only 6°. Saturday's forecast: 20° but with a chill of only 10°. And tonight? Well... tonight is expected to drop to 3°... “chill”... 1°.
No matter, really... not now, anyway. Tonight, Yonah's radiator is on, the temperatures aren't “minus”... She'll be cozy again, and sleeping well-protected against ANY sort of “chill”, and we have some time together to come... SWEETEST LOVE!

Wednesday 07 April:
Oh... It was another one of those “typical North Country” days, when the seasons are changing: chilly and damp. BUT it was another day passed WITH YONAH!
AND... I DID order shelving... steel, and almost as if “made to order” for her house on the back gallery! (Sadly, I'll have to go fetch it which means some hours away from the house and away from Yonah. I dread... DREAD those times, especially since we're looking at a good 3 hours, with travel and such. BUT, it's one step closer to her FREEDOM and COMFORT and since it'll keep her house raised, on the top shelf, PROTECTED! And hopefully, since it's steel, “vermin” won't be able to climb it! I think about that: her and, maybe her little ones, being protected from predators and vermin. I INSIST that she be as comfortable and safe as is possible! HEY! SHE'S *FAMILY*... even if she should decide to just leave... she'll ALWAYS carry my heart and soul with her.)
The sun DID mange to come through a bit, late in the morning but the temperature kept the chill in the breeze. I managed to open the doors again today, to circulate more fresh air through the house. I thought of opening Yonah's windows today too, but I'm going to have to think of a way to do that with-out moving her house all over the place to get at them. I'm thinking of some sort of plastic “liner” or the sort so I can just slide the house side-to-side across the table she's on now. (When the shelving comes... we'll see how that works out in the house until she moves to the gallery.) I DO NEED to get her window open for the odd “HOT” days that will come (in between the COLD days that will come as well). She probably won't mind the warmth, the “heat”, but we WILL NEED the air circulating. Her room will get quite hot when the sun beats in and if I have to leave the house and close the doors, well... I want her to be “warm and comfy”... not “roasted”.
So I worked more on this little “Journal” today and am looking forward to getting it all on-line. I doubt anybody else will ever see it, but, on-line, it'll be “there”, for me to read through, no mater where, in the world, I might ever be. At this rate, it would make quite a “web-site” in and of itself. (I'm considering more and more of late... Yonah... and her own web-site! Inspiration and information for ALL! What a little “Celeb” she'd be!) And, of course, the work got done in her room, with her. We kept each-other good company today.
And tonight... TONIGHT... THE SOUNDS OF THE “PEEPERS”! THE LITTLE FROGS IN THE WOODS THAT ARE THE HARBINGERS OF ACTUAL “SPRING”!!! WE'RE ON OUR WAY! (OK. Sadly, the forecast has other “seasons” in mind... The far-range forecast is still calling for 0° on the nights of the 20th and 21st! WILL THIS NEVER ACTUALLY END? I know “It ain't July yet” but THIS is getting intolerable! I've a little lady here who needs to be back home with her own!) Tomorrow's forecast is for 20°! So I WILL figure the “figurations” for moving Yonah's place. (I might have to go get the shelving tomorrow too... and if the temperature is going to be THAT HOT... her window will HAVE to be open!)
But, for tonight, she and I are “snoozy”, her waters are fresh, her house is neat and tidy. Tonight we sleep... tomorrow will take care of itself... as we take care of it. Having order the shelving is a double-edged “comfort and sorrow”. It's a comfort because it's one less thing to be concerned about... it's a sorrow because, well... it's an acknowledgement of the empty days ahead. Honestly? I NEVER even imagined Yonah and I would be together now. And I recall the “advice” from “the bird people”... “Put it in a shoe-box with some paper and keep it as comfortable as you can for as long as...” Trust people? I, no more than Yonah ever should.

Thursday 08 April:
“Morning Call”.. 6.30. I SO wanted to stay in bed for a while this morning, but... my Heart beckoned from the other room, so the day commenced... with a “woo-HOO-hoo-hoo” in the soul and a smile on the face. And the forecast for 21°! DOORS were opened and... AND... plastic sheeting went under Yonah's house and... HER WINDOWS ARE OPEN TODAY! It took a little bit of “doing” but now, I can easily “slide” her house across the table and reach over to open and close the windows. FRESH AIR!
It was ALL SO WORTH THE WHILE BECAUSE TODAY, SHE GOT THE “BREEZE” OF FRESH AIR AND THE WARMTH OF THE SUN-SHINE TO BASK IN! AND SHE DID BASK! it truly IS a beautiful sight to see her laying on the sand as the sun shines on her. She looks so comfy, so calm. And her room gets so much sun-shine during the day. One of these days she'll be able to bask any-where she wants to... I often imagine her on the banks of the river. They're sand, clean sand, from the rocks up on the mountains. The water is always crystal clear. Just perfect for her. That's her “WORLD” there! That's where she came from... and, one of these days, soon now, she'll be back in it.
Got the notice: her shelving is in the store! I'm happy about that so that I can get her off that table for now... and when the weather is right, she'll be out on the back gallery... free to come and go... or... simply “go” if she chooses. (The only part I truly DON'T like is the thought of being away from her and the house for a minimum of 4 hours. I actually miss her when I'm on the road, no matter how far I go or for how long. She's used to me being here with her all the time... or, at least, most of it. The truck wasn't running this Winter so I was at home almost “always” and I guess she got used to “company”, whether I was in her room or not. There was a “presence”. So when I'm out, it must be strange to her... When I'm out, it's horrible for me. I worry about her, I think about her, I have to keep the door to her house closed and I don't like doing that. She's NOT “caged”. I do it more so that she doesn't fly around the house because she might fly into a window or wall and I want to be there, immediately! The thought of her on the floor, injured, alone... It actually sickens me. Anyway... I'll get up tomorrow, get the “routine” done and run... RUN for the shelving! We'll have the rest of the day together... and we'll see how it all works out.)
As for the rest of today? One item of REAL NOTE: I was out on the side of the house for a bit, to “tidy” the “flower bed” which is out-side her window and... WE CHATTED AS I WORKED! SHE COO'ed AND I COO'ed BACK AND IT WENT BACK AND FORTH FOR A WHILE! AND WHEN I STOOD BY HER WINDOW, SHE LOOKED OUT AT ME, FOCUSED. SHE RECOGNISES ME AND MY VOICE! ITS HEART-WARMING! (I wonder: when she's out and back with the flock, when I step out the door, will she still recognise me and if so, will she remember me with Love or fear? And if I call her name, will she recognise that? And again... with Love or fear? How I wonder.) But I'll suppose that, since she “chatted” she must NOT hate or fear me so that's a GREAT HONOUR AND COMFORT TO MY HEART AND SOUL!
When the little “garden work” was done, I came back in for the rest of the day to share the sun-shine in Yonah's company and worked, some more, on her web-works. We got to spend most of the day together again. So all is quite well all round.
And tonight, her house is settled, we did close the windows for the night because it's still getting rather chilly once the sun sets. Two things about the new “plastic sheeting”: I can move her so I can get to open her windows AND... as the sun moves across the sky and her table, I can move her house to give her the most sun-shine! But tonight? Well... the sun sets, the skies darken... and she and I settle-in for another night. We had a REALLY WONDERFUL DAY TOGETHER TODAY!

Friday 09 April:
OH! But it was a morning of anxieties! Primarily because of leaving Yonah alone for so long. This was the first time I was away for so many hours! AND, it was a sunny day, warm, and I had to keep her windows closed, just in case of any change. I made sure she she had plenty of fresh food and water, and took comfort in knowing that she was safe... from rain and predators and the likes. And the shelving is integral to her return to FREEDOM! TO her return to the flocks and her “Normal” life. I promised to care for her until such time when weather and such will be kinder to her and I reminded myself that I MUST, for my own heart and her happiness, keep that promise... and THAT put me on the road.
As I say... she had plenty of food and water, and this morning, she had her cod liver oil (for extra vitamins). The flocks in the back yard were served breakfast and...
Well, I left a little later than I'd originally planned but it all went VERY well... and not only did I get the shelving, since all the stores where conveniently “there”... I made a stop at the “pet” store where I got a little jar of “meal worms” which I'm to understand will help provide her with needed protein. THEN, on to the market where I got her some of the freshest broccoli I've seen in a market in a good long while! And THEN... on the way back home, I stopped at the local store for more “Wild Song-Bird” food as well... mostly because of the smaller seeds that Yonah likes, but also for the flocks in the yard. It was a “Bird Shopping” day and I was THRILLED to be able to get something for Yonah, other than the shelving.
BUT... I didn't get back until 16.30!!! I'd been gone for almost FOUR HOURS! And I felt terrible about it! POOR BABE... in the house, alone, all those hours, windows closed! (But, to be honest, it had reached 23° out-side but in her room, it was actually cooler so that was a bit of a relief to me.) Of course, when I get back, I IMMEDIATELY RAN TO HER AND AS I WENT INTO HER ROOM, SHE SAW ME AND COO'ed!!! So of course, I went directly to her, told her how much I LOVE her and how I MISSED her and RAN to un-pack the truck and park it and came back in IMMEDIATELY!
Since it was “meal time”, I threw some food on the hob and as I cooked, Yonah and I “chatted” room-to-room. I coo'ed... she coo'ed... back and forth!
When meal and washing-up was done, I went in to Yonah's room to take care of the day's receipts and spend time with her. I'd put a few meal worms in for her and it seemed she'd at t least tried one. I'll have to see if she actually enjoys them. If so... I'll get more. If not? Well... we'll find alternatives that she DOES enjoy! I don't mind at all!
Well, it got to be later and time for us both to “close house” for the night. So I gathered the things I'd brought in... her waters got changed (as always at the end of a day)... her curtains got closed, light blocks up... and, as I do EVERY night and HAVE DONE EVERY NIGHT SINCE SHE CAME INTO THE HOUSE... “I LOVE YOU”. (And I DO LOVE HER SO VERY MUCH!)
The day was a “wrap”! And tomorrow? We'll spend the day together... we'll see what can be done with her new shelving, and all sorts of things! THAT'S MY LOVE! THAT'S MY LIFE! THAT'S MY SOLE REASON FOR EVEN BEING!

Saturday 10 April:

Today was “thorough” day of fresh waters for drinking and bathing, kitchen roll change and sifting through the wild song-bird seeds. There's a “canister” FULL of the smaller seeds, specifically separated for Yonah, and I make SURE there's ALWAYS more than enough available, on hand. (And the rest of the seeds, like sun-flower with shells, and the “nuts” and such, well... the birds in the yard appreciate those. So ALL are well-fed around the house.)
This morning's “longer range” weather forecast predicts “snow” on the 20th of this month AND the possibility of same on 13th May! We really didn't have a “brutal” Winter this year, in fact, for the most part, it wasn't much of “North Country Winter” at all, BUT... it's dragging and lingering and that's getting on my nerves. The “snow patch” on the Bald Peak is obviously diminishing, and that's good to see, but it isn't “impressively” diminished. When THAT goes, completely, we should be in the clear as far as Winter is concerned. So I keep watching... and hoping.
It was a glorious day though, weather-wise. Yonah's window and the back door were open. Fresh air flowing through the house. Only the slightest “chill” to the breezes, but SURELY worth keeping windows and doors open... AT LONG LAST! We, Yonah and I, are rapidly approaching our “6-Month” anniversary (in 3 days). SIX MONTHS! POOR LITTLE ONE! IN A HOUSE, WITH “PEOPLE”! BUT... yes... although away from the “flock”, also away from predators, and bitter cold, and the need to search for food and water. Is it a “fair trade”? I'm not sure, but here she is, here I am, here we are and we've BOTH managed the make it through another Winter... and it won't be another 6 months before she'll be on the back gallery, free to decide and choose “homes”... here in her current little house (door open always) or “out there” in the WORLD that is hers by birth-right.
She's at a point now where she's comfortable enough with me around to actually “coo” when I'm in the room. And how I'd love, so much, to be able to hold her close, let her know that she's safe when I do, but she still won't have it! Being in the room, talking from a distance, that's fine. But NO holding or touching. And that really is fair. (I just wish there was a way that I could know, for certain, that she's happy... or as happy as could be, in this situation. She doesn't appear to be “un”-happy, but it would be nice to know... for certain.
I'd also love to see her flying about the house, room-to-room, exercising those wings, but I'm terrified that she'll slam into a window or a wall, as she's already done, and I'll NOT have her injured again... NOT this close to her return to her own environment! It's not just a matter of the “injuries” in general, but the thought of her experiencing ANY more pain or discomfort AND the delay in being able to get out and take flight! No... we've come this far... patience.
Tonight, after my “meal”, I opened the box for the “new shelving” that will be on the back gallery, holding Yonah's “house” (as it were). Nice, heavy-weight, “professional” (they call it) quality. Tomorrow (the plan), I'll set-up half of it, which will set Yonah's house a bit higher off the floor, more at full-window level. More sun, better “breeze” (when possible), and I'll get to see just how “sturdy” it actually is.
And before “tuck-in”, I grabbed the guitar and sat in Yonah's room and softly sang a bit of Leonard Cohen... she seemed to enjoy it! Just rested on the perch and closed her eyes. (That was either “I'm enjoying this... so relaxing.” or “Oh PLEASE, somebody come and shut him up!” Again... I wish I knew which but at least there wasn't any obvious sign of any “distress”. And HEY! She's not terrified by the sound of my voice... talking or singing. That's quite nice.)
Well... tonight we're to expect a drop to 10° but it was a great day, weather and companionship-wise. And of course... it was a “perfect” day... with the GREATEST COMPANION IN CREATION! Here's hoping we both get a night of restful, peaceful sleep... and looking forward to tomorrow... together.

Sunday 11 April:

The shelving got assembled today! I used only half of the total, but it brings Yonah's house up to just above the inner window sill which gives more exposure to the sun-light and, when the window is open, a perfect way for the breezes to blow through. She gets AIR! And now, her presence looks more like she's actually a part of the house, part of the room, instead of “something put on a table”. The old boards-and-card-board set-up is gone. Neat and tidy and indeed, quite sturdy! And, of course, as I was working on the shelving, we did a complete and thorough “house-keeping” and cleaning so waters are fresh and clean, kitchen roll... the entire works. And, I'm more at ease because, from the looks of things as they are, this shelving is going to be perfect for the back gallery. Her house fits as if both shelving and house were made together, to be used together. SO much better, I have to admit, than anything I might put together with wood (as was my original thought).
When all the “remodelling” was done, we both relaxed, listening to the radio, and today's breezes blew, comfortably, in through the window, and I sat down to continue “coding” the pages for the “photo album” of her web-pages... which are, at the end of day, now on TWO of my own sites, on-line! AND... I RECORDED HER COO'ING FOR ABOUT 6 MINUTES! I have copies of the “audio” on my phone, on the lap-top and I put a copy on the iPod to include with her “Play-list” of mourning doves, compiled from other audio files found on the internet! It was SO interesting to see her reaction when I played “her” back. She OBVIOUSLY recognised... some-how, and her head “bopped about” and she coo'ed back! I've wanted to get a recording of her to play “out-side”, when her house is on the gallery, thinking that maybe she'd feel more comfortable, more “familiar” with the set-up out there and maybe she'd actually accept the “cage” (as it is) as HERS, a place where she can always return to, and, should it be, set-up out-side “house”... maybe a little nest, a couple of “little ones” of her own. A place to “return to” at end of day, spend the night. Maybe her flock would “accept” it as a safe place as well. I'll make sure there's a constant supply of good food and fresh water, primarily for her, but of course, her flock will always be more than welcome (if she'll allow). And with a bit of her “calling”, it might make it all the more “acceptable” to all. (Oh... me and my “dreams”. But, let's face it: She's become THE integral part of “Life” every day, over these 6 months and, although I have NO intention of “keeping” her in this house where, honestly, she shouldn't be, I'd like, very much, to have her around... mostly so that I'll know she's safe.)
Tomorrow, I have to find some other “block” against the head-lights and such that we both have to learn to deal with. The previous bit of card-board just doesn't work properly now, with size and position. The thing is, I don't want to “close-up” the window with “shades” or such. I want to be able to have air circulating on the nights when the temperatures allow for open windows. So there's a little item on the agenda... and if I can figure a way, what-ever I use in the house might serve well as a “block” against the winds on the back gallery. My primary concern there is the “North” winds: they're the cold ones and the ones that blow rains toward the back of the house. Hey, it keeps my mind working and it really is a pleasure. Whether in the house or out-side, THIS little one will be pampered! (Or, as others call it... “spoiled”! And why not? She's already been through some kind of Hell... from being injured to being in an environment that's “normally” hostile toward her and hers. A little “spoiling” is appropriate. So say I.)
The REALLY GREAT NEWS of today... that snow-patch on the Bald Peak is COMPLETELY GONE as of today! AND that “threat” of snow on the 20th has been removed from the forecast! And the nights coming are, for the most part, to be in the upper teens with NO “minuses”!!! OK. it's no guarantee of “warm and toasty” to come, but the absence of snow on the Peak is the beginning of the end of long-term freezes! We're getting ever-closer to... FREEDOM DAY! (But for tonight, I have to say... it won't be exactly “tropical”, but I'm going to start not using the radiator over-night when temperatures allow. Little Yonah is going to have to start getting used to a bit of a “chill”... there won't be any “temperature control” in the “great out-doors”.)
All this said, after tuck-in tonight I'd stepped away for a bit and when I returned, there was much coo'ing from Yonah's room. So I went in to “chat” for a bit. It really DOES appear to calm her (maybe I've become a “familiar voice, associated with protection... a 'friend'”). When I left, I closed her door and all was at peace. I guess I'd forgotten to close the door... Privacy? Less light in the room? What-ever... I must now remember to close the door!
I'm trying to see “Life” with-out her, and still torn about what could happen to her and knowing that it's none of my business, really. She belongs in the wild. I wonder though, if what-ever happened to her to cause those injuries hasn't left some sort of “memory” and fear in her. She shouldn't be here, alone. I want her to find a mate. I just hope that, should she, find one, that some-how, she'll always know that that “cage” is hers, her “house”, and that I'll always do mu best to see to it that she has a safe place to turn to... for as long as... as long as...

Monday 12 April:
This morning, I opened the doors and windows to let the warmth of out-side in! Last night was a chilly one but at least no more snow and NO FREEZING!
It's obvious now, that more mourning doves are coming to the feeder in the yard and THAT, to me, is SO comforting. But what I find almost fascinating is that, Yonah coo's and I know that the sound goes out into the yard, but the doves out-side seem not to notice. I wonder WHY. I would think that they'd, at lest, sense that she's in here, and hearing her, would have SOME sort of “curiosity”. And she's been quite vociferous most of the day today. (It bothers me, thinking she might be “calling” to them “out there”. Could she be lonely? Missing the flock? Missing “her own”? AND HOW I WISH I COULD, COMFORTABLY, JUST ASSEMBLE THE SHELVING, PUT HER HOUSE OUT THERE AND KNOW, FOR A FACT, THAT SHE'D BE SAFE AND NOT BE SUBJECTED TO HORRID COLD. She's been in the warmth of the house for these 6 months and has had NO exposure to actual cold. And Friday is expected to drop again! I'm trying to “adjust” the coolness of her room so that “cool” nights won't come as a shock. But... I just can't, in clear conscience, and calm heart, just “throw” her into that situation. I'm a “mess”, and anxious to see her FREE again!)
I'm most seriously “plotting and planning” on figuring a way to let her fly about the house now, if, for no other reason, to make sure she CAN FLY properly! She hasn't had any need to fly any distance and certainly couldn't fly at any speed. But I'd like to see THAT she CAN fly. Her left wing never did heal “properly”. The edge feathers are still a bit “off”, not perfectly formed, but not hideously malformed. And she CAN flap her wings, and CAN stretch them. It's the speed and distance that concern me... particularly the speed. Out there, she'll NEED to be able to get away if attacked. I look at the doves in the yard and I see that they don't always “soar at top speed” even from the feeder to the trees. Still, little Yonah here, fell prey once. I certainly didn't bring her in, to offer protection and recovery, to “toss” her back into the jaws and claws of what-ever! So, I suppose we're due to go into “PT” and “OT” (physical and occupational therapies).
I'm also pondering heading out or ordering-in a cot of some sort to put in her room. It's selfish of me, really, and probably not in the best interest of either of us, but I'd like to spend as much time with her now as I possibly can. Sensibly though, that does no good as far as avoiding “attachment”... on either side! If she were to be staying for the long-term, I most certainly WOULD get a cot, at the very least, to have in her room. I could take my “naps” and “snoozes” with her and, who knows? An occasional “sleep-over”. (OK... I HAVE to admit: I DO “need” her company... I AM “attached”... yes, I LOVE this little one SO VERY MUCH! No shame about it.)
Meanwhile... another day of JOY passes and at end of day, fresh food, fresh kitchen roll, fresh water... clean house... as always.
A note though: the temperature in her room dropped to 18° today and little Yonah was “fluffed”. I see NO reason for that now. Although, it might be a good idea for her to start “adjusting and adapting” while temperature can be “controlled”. “Trial and error”... trial and error. At least she coo's... she's comfortable enough to do that.
TOMORROW IS YONAH'S *** 6-MONTH ** ANNIVERSARY IN THE HOUSE. WE MADE IT THROUGH THE WINTER... TOGETHER!!! And I still think of “Mr. Bird People”... “Put it in a box and make it as comfortable as you can for how-ever long...” HEY! BABE! Mr. BIRD-PEOPLE! MY HEART AND SOUL IS STILL COO'ING... even as I type this... WOO-HOO! AND I LOVE HER... MORE THAN I CAN EXPRESS!!! WE MADE IT AND WE'RE STILL GOING STRONG! WE MADE IT! (“For how-ever long...” Indeed!)

Tuesday 13 April: Our *** *** SIX-MONTH ANNIVERSARY *** ***
(It's not that I'm “thrilled” that little Yonah has been, what, to some extent, could be construed as “captive”... which it isn't, no matter how it appears, but I AM excited because, to be honest, when she came into the house, 6 months ago... I had NO idea that she would “recover from her injuries”, honestly didn't expect her to manage through the first week, and NEVER thought that she'd be here in ANY manner or fashion, through the Winter. AND, with the pessimism of Mr. Bird-People, well... BUT... HERE WE ARE! AND...)
I LOVE HER MORE, IF THAT'S POSSIBLE, THAN EVER... BUT THAT LOVE INCREASED DAILY... NO, BY THEM MOMENT! IN FACT, INDEED, SHE ACTUALLY IS MY EXISTENCE! SHE'S MY BLESSING, MY LIGHT, MY HONOUR AND PRIVILEGE. To think, each day, that she's still with me, in good health, and comfortable enough around me to coo, in the morning, through a day... AND WHEN I WALK INTO THE ROOM, SHE COMES ACROSS HER PERCH TO BE CLOSER TO ME, AS IF WELCOMING ME INTO “HER” SPACE, “HER” ROOM, “HER” HOME HERE! AND THAT SHE TRUSTS ME BEING IN CLOSE PROXIMITY! Some-how, she KNOWS I mean her no harm! NEVER... I NEVER even entertained the possibility of this! \And today... SIX MONTHS LATER... WOW!
Yes, I still look forward to seeing her take flight, into the great, endless space of this “wilderness” in which we reside here, out to where-ever she wants to go, to be, and with her flock, with a mate, friends, the other doves. That's where she ought to be. Yes, i'll wonder wand worry, hoping that she remains safe, protected, comfortable, having all that she needs for her happiness, un-harmed. But keeping her in this “cage”, in this room, in this house, is all un-fair, contrary to her nature. Still... there's really no way to express my gratitude to her and FOR her. These 6 months have been nothing less than PURE ASTONISHMENT, EACH AND EVERY DAY.
I've read that, in the wild, doves average 1,5 years... well... she's had 6 months of protection, warmth, good, healthy food, fresh water, protection against every and anything that could cause her harm or injury... I've read that, in “captivity”, doves have been known to live 20 or 30 years! May this 6 months here, give her a long, healthy, productive life. And IF there's ANY sort of “truth” to the superstitions and dreams of some sort of “existence” after this one that we call “life”, I hope she and I can find each-other “there”, knowing each-other, and be able to “chat” about her time here. And should she have children, may she pass along her knowledge and experience, knowing how to avoid what-ever danger that caused her to be here, and that actually, NOT ALL humans are HATEFUL, HEARTLESS, EVIL! And may her children know that my heart belongs to them... as it belongs to their mother.
The rest of today was drenched in sun-shine, golden in the morning, brilliant white through the day. Appropriate, to be sure. I thought of heading to a “PetCo”... which is quite a distance from here but, I wanted to get Yonah something for today, something to bring her some sort of happiness.
And, as I often do, I couldn't help but think of the future... if she can't or doesn't take to her freedom, her return to the “wild”. I thought: a large “kennel”... one of those “dog crates” instead of this “bird cage” she has now. The room she's in now is hers for as long as she's here, no matter. And the space at the windows is hers. But a “dog crate” would give her SO MUCH MORE ROOM, and maybe, eventually, if she were to stay, I might be able to find a “companion” for her... of some sort of dove or another. But, my first thought is her “home on the back gallery”... to be sure. I focus on that, primarily.
And so... I had to get out and get some shopping done today and... AND... OO! MORE “SPECIAL” foods! (The sad part, the part that gave me anxieties and more... I was away for HOURS!) BUT, it was OBVIOUS that I was “missed”! I walked into the house and, as I ALWAYS do, no matter how long or short I've been away, IMMEDIATELY in to see Yonah. It had been another HOT day and I'd left her windows closed, in case of storms. Fortunately, her room was cooler than it was out-side (the closed windows and doors kept the heat and humidity out). AH... WHEN I WALKED INTO HER ROOM, SHE *BOUNCED* OVER TO GREET ME! And, to be honest, my HEART BOUNCED to see her! (People who know her story keep telling me that she's not going to leave me... no matter what I do. I have to wonder... Of course, my life would be SO FULL to have her in it for how-ever many years we might have, but..) I felt a little “relieved” knowing that I'd gone away to shop for the house BUT... I BROUGHT A BAG OF “HULLED” SUN-FLOWER SEEDS FOR HER AND A MIX OF TINY-GROUND “PELLET-LIKE” FRUITS AND VEGETABLES TO ADD TO HER DIET! A HUGE IMPROVEMENT OVER THE “COMMON SEEDS” IN THE “WILD SONG-BIRD” MIX! WE CHATTED A BIT AND I GOT RIGHT TO GRINDING THE SUN-FLOWER SEEDS TO “SWALLOWABLE” SIZE (because mourning doves don't break seed shells and they don't “chew” so everything has to be small enough to simply swallow, as is). Mixed it all with a “'serving” of her “regular” diet, in a small quantity, just in case she “disapproves” and to avoid causing her any “digestive distress” because of the change of food. Fresh drinking water, fresh “pool” water... with fresh food! SHE WAS SO BLATANTLY OBVIOUSLY DELIGHTED THAT I WAS BACK! And she was “curious” about the fresh food... pecked at it, but I have to watch to see what she chooses, because I've learnt they “choose” what they'll eat, no matter what's served or available. Hey! She's on her way back out soon... I WANT HER PERFECTLY HEALTHY, STRONG, READY TO TAKE ON THE WORLD! SEEDS, FRUITS, VEGGIES... IMPORTANT! And it's my absolute pleasure to be able to provide her with what-ever is available. Oh... best yet? All “natural” food! (I read EVERY ingredient label! The ONLY bits were the “added vitamins and minerals” in the “fruit and vegetable mix”. But those are GOOD!)
So now, she has quite the “collection” of foods now, and what-ever is left when she leaves will be put in the “feeder” that's set-up in the yard... NOT to mention, I'll be keeping a food dish and water dish freshly filled, ever day, in her house, when it's on the back gallery. She'll ALWAYS have access to these “specialties”! No matter what the situation or where she might decide to be. As long as she comes back, she'll get my Love, Affection, Attention and EVERY little pleasure and “luxury” I can find and provide! She'll NEVER be “turned away” nor “abandoned”! NEVER!
Tonight, it was about 19.30 when she “let me know” it was time for “nigh-night”. First, she comes to the door of her house, as if to attract my attention. Then a few little “woo-HOO-hoo-hoo's” followed by a jump to the position on her perch where she sleeps (the front, right corner of her house). And there, she settles and watches me until... I get her fresh waters together for the night, fresh kitchen roll where needed, and we get to the “evening routine”. And tonight, in contrast to the heat of the day, the temperatures threaten to drop to “quite chilly”, so... HER radiator got turned on, just high enough to ward off any chill that might try to get to her. (And Friday's forecast is threatening a “high” of 5°! WILL THIS WINTER NEVER END?) When all was done and “life” settled, I pulled a chair up beside her house and we had a nice little chat about the day. I apologised for my lengthy absence, told the particulars of the day, assured her that SHE is my PRIMARY reason for even “being” these days and, I just had to tell her that, no matter what becomes of her, should she go back to her flock(s), she and hers will ALWAYS have a place of refuge and protection in this house. And you know? I have to say that I get the feeling that on some level, some-how, she actually understands just how much I DO LOVE, CHERISH and RESPECT her! She sets on her perch, pretty much staring at me as I talk... ever so calmly... And it was time to close her little door (because I worry that she might try to take flight in the darkness at night and, since doves don't see well in the dark... well... walls, windows, furnishings...), put out the light for the night. Her curtains were closed, the “head-light block” was up... the day came to a close... We're another day farther away from the cold of Winter, closer to the warmth of Summer... another day...
It's going to be quite difficult “going on” with-out her... But if she stays around, I'll still have a reason to... If she heads out and away? Well...

Wednesday 14 April:
We had SOME sun-shine today and, for the most part, it was “comfortably” warm. Yonah had open windows and FRESH, REAL AIR again today. (I keep thinking of how “still” it was all Winter, with no windows open, no “moving” air. I wonder if she missed it at all. But she seems to truly enjoy the occasional breeze that comes in through her window... SWEET LITTLE ONE! One of these days there'll be MORE of those breezes... and she'll be SOARING on them!)
And we had another rather “vociferous” sort of day today. Yonah is “singin' the glory” of warmer weather... and part of my heart aches thinking: THIS is the season she'd be out, being “woo'ed” by mates, thinking of nests, little ones. OH! It IS painful to me, and yet, the pain of thinking of her, “out there” on a cold night... and FRIDAY'S FORECAST IS “MINUS 1” AGAIN FOR THE NIGHT! My heart can't even take the passing notion of her being subjected to that kind of cold! I CAN'T... and I WON'T slam her into such cruelty! I'll continue to do the very best I possibly can for and by her and the only thing I can do other-wise is HOPE SHE UNDERSTANDS... SOME-HOW...
I realised today that my “plans” for her place on the back gallery needs more thinking-through. I've been thinking of making the Eastern and Northern sides some-how closed against winds and rains. The Western side has the extension of the house to block that sort of thing. BUT, I have to be careful of how and what I choose to use because I MUST take into account, vermin and such that might climb up and get into her house! AND... if there are eggs or little ones in there... THAT could be a complete HORROR! Oh well... more to “obsess” over (as I'm sure some people would call it.)
Interesting today: As I was changing the waters today, AND, through the day, I left the door to her house open, mostly to see what sort of response/reaction she'd have to it. I expected a BOLT FOR FREEDOM BUT... She just came to the opening, stood there, staring at it, tilting her head left, right, back and forth, as if to say “Something's not right, here...” BUT, she didn't even TRY to get out! I really would like to see how she manages in the house since she hasn't REALLY FLOWN in 6 months. There's almost just enough space inside her house to do a tiny bit of “flying”, and she does that quite well. I have to wonder how she'd handle going through door-ways, and room-to-room. It scares me a bit, because of previous “encounters” with windows and walls, but surely she could use the “openness” of the house... a bit more space, more distance. AND, there's the ability to “adjust speed”. Well, today was a “first try”... and since she obviously doesn't panic, I'll do this “open door” from now on. One of these days. After all, when her house is on the back gallery, she'll be able to take flight for quite the distance... NO WALLS... NO WINDOWS! Just out, up and into the trees! OH HOW I LOOK FORWARD TO SEEING THAT!
But, for tonight, today, for now... she doesn't need to be bothered by Friday night's cold, needing to dodge predators that would tear her to shreds, (or humans who'd blast her to un-identifiable bits, calling it “fun” or “sport”... worthless bits of filth, those). Her room, her house, are safe, warm, and HERS! Just as is my heart and soul.
THANK THE FATES FOR THIS LITTLE LIFE, THIS LITTLE BEING, THIS LITTLE DIVINE LIGHT AND JOY, INSPIRATION, AWE-FULL HAND-FULL OF FEATHERED PERFECTION!

Thursday 15 April:
Today was one of those dark, rainy, cool-but-not-cold days and, because I have work that I'm doing these days, it was a day... A DAY with YONAH! Of course it started with the regular changing waters, freshening food, replacing kitchen roll, keeping house neat, tidy... free of ANYTHING that MIGHT cause little Yonah ANY sort of discomfort. But, I have to admit, I was really occupied with my banquing transcriptions and accounts for quite a bit of the time.
Every break (and there were several, I must say) was chatting. Yonah's room is always much warmer than any other room in the house during these still-chilled days, so we sort of “luxuriated” in that. She has her own little electric radiator, and we kept her door closed as I worked and she either rested on perches or had little nibbles here and there. And I have to say, she DOES make it “known” and “obvious” that she's aware of my presence, even if we're just listening to the radio (or, her “Play-list”, which I've come to enjoy... and appreciate; all the little “bird songs” actually are a delight to listen to... they're relaxing). And every once and again, she comes over to the front of her house (the door was open all day again today), and she pokes her head out, looks round the room, up to the ceiling, back and forth and then, she'll stop and stare at me as if to say “What's THIS? I can see the ceiling! Where are the little black bars here now?” I'm still rather quite amazed that she shows NO interest in taking a good flight!
Well, this is how we spent the day, together, and tonight... a check of tomorrow's weather (which I do “religiously” now, hoping for a LONG range of VERY WARM days and nights)... * * * * * S N O W * * * * * AGAIN! AND a “chill” of... MINUS ONE AGAIN! OH! OH! OH! Does Nature HATE us both this much? Can it be? Hey, though... this little bundle of “COO” and LOVE is here and we're here, and we're here together, and she's safe, protected, so let Nature dump what-ever out there... In here... little Yonah is warm and toasty. And tomorrow? Well.. FINE! Let it do what it will... We'll be together then too! So THERE!

Friday 16 April:
Yes, AGAIN, this morning... * * * S N O W ***, with a temperature of 4°! These cold temperatures and continuing snows drag my spirits down, because each one just postpones the day of Yonah's “return” to the rest of the flocks that congregate each morning and evening, out-side the back door. There's such a great part of me that wants to simply take the chance that all will go well, that Yonah will “take to the skies”, the “old flock” will welcome her back (with many tales to be told), a safe haven will be awaiting and that the rest will keep her warm and safe. But the over-riding feeling, in my gut, is that the sudden drop of temperatures, from the warmth of the house for so long to sub-freeze would simply be too much, SO suddenly and it would result in either harm or... dare I even say it... death. I was, obviously, foolish, through these months, to think that by April, there would be a “warming trend” enough to simply move on, move forward. I'm NOT even implying that it won't be oppressive, this atmosphere, my general situation and environment, with-out this little bundle of BEAUTY here. But the “good sense”, logic of the situation is that Yonah is a mourning dove, a “wild” dove, a being of the open air and spaces and NOT, by ANY stretch, a “pet”. Certainly NOT “domestic”. And my heart wants to see her back, living the life into which she was born. Ah... “these are the days”.

As the day progressed, the snows became rains, so with the chill came the dampness. THANKFULLY Yonah's room maintained a 23,9° through it all (that little radiator certainly is a charm). INTERESTINGLY... as “Spring rains” will do, however, I happened to notice *** GREEN BUDS *** on the trees! Slight, but obviously noticeable! “Spring” IS trying to break through! How I wish there were something I could do to help it along!
BUT... It was a perfect day for spending time with my most BELOVED Companion... and we DID! I had, as usual, MORE than enough in “chores and tasks” to keep me busy at the work table in Yonah's room, and the little radiator did a wonderful job of keeping both of us quite warm and toasty. Aside form the afore-mentioned delay in Yonah's return, it was a pure delight, all told. And I managed to get MUCH done on her photos, audio and videos... and have transferred them to servers... else-where... so no matter what happens in the house, they're safe (and that's quite important to me as well... because, at some time in future, they'll be all that I'll have of this glorious experience with this DIVINE bundle of LIFE and COO'in).
Tonight's “threat” (weather) is 2° with a chill of -1° and what tomorrow will bring is to be seen. But it's a relief to see that the temperature is “single-digit” and above freezing (better than double-digit sub-freezing).
And Yonah is safely “tucked-in”, protected from the elements, the predators, the cold... another great night ahead in which to rest... with-out a care.

Saturday 17 April:
TODAY'S “MIRACLE MEMO”: Since Yonah's been here, I've made these little “kissing clicks” with my lips... just little “ticking” sounds... WELL TODAY... SHE'S MAKING THE CLICKS IN RETURN! And I'm to understand, from reading and research, that those “clicks” actually ARE an indication of contentment and affection! Another “good guess”! And it's SO HEART-WARMING! HEY! WE'RE NOT “ENEMIES”!!! I COULDN'T ASK FOR ANYTHING BETTER THAN THAT!
It was another “grey day” out there and, the saddest: that spot on the Bald Peak is... white... again! Yonah's days are being postponed... AGAIN! Though, in honesty, she doesn't appear to mind much at all. Well, I do suppose she's safe, warm, protected from the cold, the rain, the winds and such. AND SHE IS SO VERY LOVED AND CHERISHED!!! So, it looks like we have more time together. This “cold snap” is supposed to go away, again, during the week... but, of course, a return of the “Winter Vengeance” is still lurking... next week. HOPEFULLY, when this month is over, we, Yonah and I, can welcome a “Spring” together... and she can welcome it with her flocks... HOPEFULLY!
We DID pass the day together again, and there's NEVER ANYTHING “negative” to be said about THAT!
And as for the “kissing clicks”... I'd almost swear that she even mimics the number! If I click thrice, she repeats. Four times, and it's the same. Not only is it heart-warming that she does it at all, it PROVES THAT SHE'S COGNIZANT OF EVEN THE NUMBER! AND... AS I WORK ALONG, ONE OF US WILL START A “CONVERSATION” WITH A “coo-WOO-hoo-hoo” AND THE OTHER WILL REPLY! IT ACTUALLY IS A CONVERSATION! OH! BY GOD!!! HOW CAN A HEART BE EMPTY WITH THIS LOVE? And I ask “Why me? How me?” I see this as a GRANDEST BLESSING from what-ever “Divinity” there might be!
This evening, as it was time to “close the day”, I sat again, as I do, on the chair, beside her house, with the door open, and we “chatted”... LITERALLY, for a good 45 minutes! It AMAZES me how she comes to her perch, right at the door, looks me straight in the face and COO'S as I talk! And when I coo in return, she picks right up with her own reply, almost immediately! I'm AWE-STRUCK! To KNOW that this little LIFE, the BEAUTIFUL, MAGNIFICENT little LIFE has come to trust me, to communicate with me, and allows me to communicate with her... not to mention that she OBVIOUSLY feels secure in my company! It gives most serious cause to pause for some EXTREME INTROSPECTION and yes... AWE!
My days are so FULL, so WONDER-FULL, so AMAZING! And when I think of my age, and all the years I've had with-out all of this... to be so BLESSED, so GLORIOUSLY BLESSED at this time in my life... my existence... These are the moments of the days when we come to know that, apparently, our birth was with some purpose. Little Yonah came along in need... and I was there, here, at the moment, to give her all that she required. And where this all goes from here? Well... that's all in the “Great Un-known and Un-knowable”. But for now... IT'S JUST GLORIOUS!

Sunday 18 April:
OH! BUT HOW THE SUN POURED IN THROUGH YONAH'S WINDOW THIS MORNING! It was GLORIOUS! (Sadly, it didn't last all that long and by after-noon, we were back to “normal”... rain. But it was a DELIGHT for the morning!) AS SHE BASKED IN THE BRILLIANCE, I COULD NOTICE: WHAT A DIFFERENCE IN HER FEATHERS FROM SINCE THE PHOTO OF “20201231_152923” (2020 31 December)! (I've been working with that photo to create “stationary”, and “icons” and such.) THOUGH THE WHITE TAIL FEATHERS NO LONGER SHOW AS MUCH AS THEY DID THEN, WHICH I BELIEVE IS A “GOOD” SIGN... AND PERHAPS DUE TO HER “AGING”, THE GENERAL CONDITION OF HER FEATHERS HAS BECOME “SOFTER”, “SMOOTHER” AND THICKER! SHE'S LOOKING *VERY* WELL, INDEED! THAT, AND HER “CHATTING” WITH ME, EATING AND DRINKING WHILST I'M IN THE ROOM *AND THE WAY SHE COMES TO THE FRONT OF HER PERCH WHEN I COME INTO THE ROOM* ... MY HEHART IS FULL, COMPLETE, JOYFUL, ELATED... AND I STILL WONDER HOW IT IS THAT *I* WAS GIVEN THIS OPPORTUNITY TO HELP HER, AND TO HAVE HER IN MY LIFE WHERE, WELL, OTHER-WISE, I DOUBT, MOST SERIOUSLY, THAT I WOULD HAVE SURVIVED THROUGH THIS WINTER (health and such considered). AH... YES... SHE'S MY ***** MIRACLE ***** IN OH, SO MANY WAYS!
And I have to say that having the new shelving proves an asset again and again. I can move her house across the table she's on so as to give her MORE time in the sun-shine! As it moves across the sky, I can move her house to catch it. Today, unfortunately, it didn't do much for “warmth”, and it's a shame that it's filtred through screen and glass (since both tend to reduce the amount of “UV” that she needs for vitamin D production, but at least it's “light” and NOT from an electric bulb. Sure, I suppose a “full spectrum” light would be better than a regular, but I see that it's no substitute for actual SUN... then again, nothing really is. But today, after such a dreary Winter... May this be just the beginning of MANY MORE days of brilliant sun-shine (and WARMTH to follow immediately)!
As I say, I took a copy of that photo from 31 December and have been working with it. I'd like, very much, to create some stationary, OK, for me, since I most seriously doubt Yonah will be sending notes and lettres, and if I can manage to work it into “e-mail stationary”, I'd be happy. And I'm working on creating a little “icon” for the computer, for her directories and files... and perhaps, eventually, maybe one of those “Favicons” for the internet where, when people “visit” a site, the little icon appears at the top of the screen AND becomes a “Bookmark”. Thus far, I've managed to get an image “embedded” into a “word document” and that's working quite well. It would be a matter of either printing sheets with it and writing or, I could even type and print (or covert to “PDF” and send digitally)! (SOME might say this little Dove has become an out-right “obsession”... and I might say they're spot-on... BUT... these have been AMAZING months with this Little One here and, well, the only way to actually understand it all would be to have lived it. Call it what one will, the fact remains: this Little One factually IS my Life.)
And so, Yonah and I had yet another entire day together. I worked at the work table, she basked, napped, ate and we chatted now and again during the day. And we had our usual “before tuck-in” chat again this evening where the events of the day are discussed and mentioned, and thoughts on “tomorrow” get tossed about. The house is calm and “comfortable”. The morning sun-shine helped keep us warm, and just before sun-set, there was a glimmer of light which gave more reprieve from the drear.
Tonight's “low” temperature is to be 2° with a “chill” of 0°. We aren't passed the “freezes” just yet... especially at night. I keep thinking of Yonah “out there”, on nights like these, some-where, perhaps in an old barn or shed, some-where, as the temperatures plummet. It breaks my heart even to think of it. And on Wednesday-week... -1° again (sub-freeze) with a “chill” of -6°. Well? At least here, though it might not be “natural”, little Yonah has NOTHING to be concerned about, the radiator is here to ward-off the cold, there's MORE than plenty of food and water... no predators... nothing to harm her in any way. We've made it this far... we'll make it as far as we need to do.

Monday 19 April:

YONAH WAS OUT IN THE HOUSE TODAY... SHE FLEW FROM HER ROOM TO THE KITCHEN!!!
Morning call came at about 5.45, coffee on and the “changing of the waters” commenced. Breakfast was served, in the house and “on the back veranda”. ALL the little ones were attended. And it was a touch on the over-cast side, but a mist rose over the brook and the river. “Warmer weather” is arriving!
I DID get out and down the road to the woods and DID get the new, fresh “trees” for Yonah! And when I got back with them, I decided it was a perfect opportunity to give the tubing a thorough cleansing in the kitchen basin AND to change the paper in her cage. To that end... I opened the door to her cage and “went to work”, taking out the old, dry white pine branches, and her pool. Brought the pool to the kitchen basin and set it up so that I could run constant fresh water into the dish that would be pumped out into the other basin whilst I attended the rest of the “house-keeping” (removing the paper, and such). WELL... all was going as it usually does, with Yonah sitting on her little “corner shelf” when, as I was in the kitchen, finishing the “pool cleaning” I heard that “familiar” sound of wings... I turned to see ***** ***** ***** Yonah FLYING ABOUT IN HER ROOM!!! I didn't panic and walked SLOWLY into the room. She alighted on the top of her shelving and was staring out the window! Perfectly fine, save for an obvious quick breathing. PRECIOUS LITTLE ONE! SHE TOOK FLIGHT AND DIDN'T HIT WALLS NOR WINDOWS!!! When I went over to talk with her about her “flight”, she was, as I say, breathing heavily and a bit rapidly BUT SHE DIDN'T FLY AWAY! SHE JUST PERCHED, RIGHT THERE, WHERE SHE WAS, AS IF ALL WAS PERFECTLY WELL AND FINE! So I chatted with her a bit longer, checking for any “damages” and when I saw none, I just went on with cleaning her cage, clipping and taping and installing her new “trees” and laying new paper. Then, I went and got her pool, all cleaned and brought that back in, put it into the cage and started the set-up. Left the room to go to the kitchen to get the fresh pool-water and when I went back into the room, SHE TOOK OFF, GOT TO THE CLOSED WINDOW, STOOD THERE FOR A MOMENT (probably trying to figure out why she couldn't get out and across the road) AND THEN...*THEN* HEADED OUT AND INTO THE KITCHEN! PERFECTLY! THROUGH THE OPEN DOOR, WITH-OUT HITTING ANYTHING! Knowing better than to make any sudden moves, I went to the door-way of her room and looked out to see where she'd gone and THERE SHE WAS... AT THE KITCHEN SINK! JUST PERFECTLY FINE AND WONDERFUL! JUST STANDING THERE AT THE EDGE! So I finished putting the fresh water into her pool and got her fresh food into the dish and went back to the kitchen to check on her. She didn't try to fly away from me, wasn't breathing heavily... she was perfectly fine and rather content! But I wasn't sure how to get her back to her cage so she could eat, so I tried to offer her a little branch that I'd had from previous attempts at perches. Nope... she wasn't having it. So I put my left hand in front of her... she didn't flinch... right had behind... again, no movement and so... I PICKED HER UP IN MY HANDS, HELD HER CLOSE TO MY FACE, WHIPSERED “I LOVE YOU” AND SHE WAS AS CALM AS COULD BE AS I CARRIED HER BACK “HOME”. When I got her back to the door of her cage, she flew in and to her little corner shelf where, after a moment or two, she began preening! It was as if her “event” was just so common-place! So I got her fresh drinking water, put her food where it always is and took a moment to “chat” with her. SHE ACTUALLY RESPONDS TO A WHISPERED “I LOVE YOU”, CLOSING HER EYES AS IF RELIEVED AND RE-ASSURED! EVERY night, before I go to bed, I put the lights out in the house and peak into her room, and in the darkness, I always wish her a good night, restful sleep AND I MAKE SURE TO WHISPER “I LOVE YOU”. SHE MUST HEAR ME AND NOW RECOGNISES THE SOUND OF THAT! PRECIOUS, MOST PRECIOUS LITTLE LOVE!!! SO there she was, after her adventure in the house and out of her cage and all was perfectly well!!! She did a little more preening and settled-down to “snooze”.
At about 19.15 this evening, we had our usual “chat” as I closed curtains and put her radiator on for the night. The doors in the house were open today because it was “pleasant” but the usual evening chill was coming along and tonight isn't supposed to get “cold”... but Wednesday night is expected to drop back to -2°. We enjoy the “good times” and “good weather” whilst we may. And I keep waiting... for the complete forecast with NO

“minuses” in ANY of the temperatures!
But, all said... WHAT A WONDERFUL, MAGNIFICENT, STUPENDOUS DAY THIS WAS! ESPECIALLY WITH YONAH FLYING ABOUT! EXERCISING THOSE WINGS! Flight isn't “'perfect”, but it's been some months since she's actually gone for a “flight” so, there's probably a bit of “Physical” and “Occupational Therapy” due. PRECIOUS, PRECIOUS LOVE!

Tuesday 20 April:

YONAH TOOK A BATH TODAY!!! AND TODAY, SHE HAS A LARGER POOL!
Oh, on this chilled and over-cast morning, I was “called”... at 5.45-ish again, but managed to grab just an extra hour of “snooze”. Of course, immediately, the “morning routine”... and the day was rolling along.
This after-noon, how-ever... when the “world” settled-down, and all went quite nice, I moved into Yonah's room to work on the “stationery” image and template. The radio was playing, the sun FINALLY made an appearance and she was basking. We were at the peace we “are” when we're together. WELL, from behind me I heard a bit of “splashing” and turned to see YONAH... JUST RELAXING... IN HER POOL! POOR SWEET-HEART! THERE WASN'T REALLY ANY ROOM FOR HER TO MOVE ABOUT SO SHE JUST SORT OF STOOD THERE IN THE WATER FOR A WHILE. THEN, SHE HOPPED OUT AND GAVE HER-SELF A SHAKE AND WENT TO HER LITTLE CORNER SHELF TO CONTINUE BASKING AND TO DRY! IT WAS SO CUTE! I'D NEVER KNOWN HER TO GO INTO THAT WATER, AND UNFORTUNATELY, BY THE TIME SHE GOT IN TODAY, IT WASN'T EXACTLY “FRESH”. SO... I TOOK A MEASUREMENT FOR THE LARGER GLASS BAKING DISH I HAVE, AND, FINDING THAT IT FIT... SHE NOW HAS THE LARGER DISH IN THERE, WITH ROCKS, OF COURSE, AND HOPEFULLY, SHE'LL HAVE ROOM TO SPLASH TO HER HEART'S CONTENT!!! Not only is it longer and wider, it's a touch deeper... but not much. And I don't fill it, of course. Just enough for her to splash about it. I'm SO HAPPY she has a place to bathe! And even happier that she seems to enjoy it! And the river rocks in there give it more of a “wild” appearance, atmosphere. Not quite the “very same” as a river or a lake/pond, but hey! It's a little bit of her actual “home territory”. I try... I'm not thinking of a “permanent long term”, but for the time she's here, I'll see to it that she's comfortable!
We spent the entire after-noon together, save the moments I too a snooze. And I DID get a nice “template” done, working with images of her. So now, I can actually type a note or letter on “Yonah” stationary and print and send! And I made the little image into an “icon so now, on the lap-top, there's an entire directory for Yonah... with HER as the ICON! (Next effort: incorporate it into the pages with her photos on-line.)
Tonight, we were having our “End of Day Chat” at about 19.30 and as I spoke, she closed her little eyes.... time for sleep! So we wrapped the day, tucked-in for the night. She had quite the day with the bathing... after yesterday's excursion out and about. PRECIOUS, MOST-CHERISHED LITTLE LOVE!
Looking at the forecast, as has become an almost-constant pre-occupation with me of late,... Thursday's threat: -2°, a chill of -8 and more SNOW! I'm feeling quite the idiot for even thinking that this or next month would be “FREEDOM”! And to be honest, it makes me a bit angry. Yes, I'll miss Yonah more than I can say. But I truly want to see her back out with the flocks, free in the open, to LIVE as her Life was intended! But, she's been in this house all through the Winter, through all the cold. I can't and won't put her out there

with-out her having had the chance to “adjust and adapt”! Especially considering she needs time to get back into flying! So? So... we're here and I'll continue doing the very best I can for her. (I just hope she doesn't “adapt” too much to this “domestic” sort of thing. Although, maybe she'll feel more comfortable being able to come back or just hanging about when she's out there. That would be nice... We'll have to wait and see... meanwhile, my Life is SO FULL... thanks to her.)

Wednesday 21 April:
IT SNOWED AGAIN, ALL DAY TODAY! AND IT ACCUMULATED! Thankfully, it changed to wet and melted, for the most part. But “snow”, of ANY sort, just sets my heart and hopes back. It's ALL about Yonah, these days! ALL OF IT!
We had a “visitor” today, young fellow. I still have NO idea how he got here, because he had no vehicle, and stopped to ask to use the phone. But the thing that I noticed more than anything else is that, as we chatted whilst he waited for his lift, Yonah heard the voices, mine, I should think, and she “called” from her room! I swear she recognises my voice now! It was as if she was calling to say “Hey! I'm in here! Who are you talking to out there? I'm in here! Hello?” If the sound of voices frightened her, I'm sure she would have been silent. So to hear her coo'ing... it makes me wonder, all the more: When she's back out in her “wilderness”, will she STILL recognise my voice? And if so, will she remember it as the voice of somebody who LOVES her, who gave her food, water, shelter, protection... or will my voice be associated with “capture”, “captivity”? I suppose I just have to wait... and see... and hope that somehow, she's come to KNOW that I DO LOVE HER SO MUCH, and that everything I did was with that LOVE, and wanting only to see her well again.
And again, I can't help but be angered; this nonsense about “humans” being the “superior” species... that nonsense that most actually accept: “man having dominion”. What a crock... a CROCK! IF humans were so damned intelligent, so damned “superior”, WE could learn to communicate with ALL other beings in Creation. As it is, dogs and cats LEARN the words of people, in EVERY language spoken. (Oh Hell, humans can't understand other humans in that respect. We have “languages” and, for the most part, those who speak one language can't communicate with those who speak a different language. “Intelligent”... yeah, sure... pull my other one.) This little mourning dove has come to understand, obviously, that I mean no harm, have only LOVE, and can even recognise the tone and quality of my voice. Yet, here I sit, unable to understand the nuances, the subtleties of “coo-WOO-hoo-hoo” and “coo-WOO”. In one respect, SHE can communicate with me... but *I* have NO way of actually comprehending what's being said. Well... I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one thinking along this line. I'm SURE there are other “humans”, out there in this old world, who have gone through, are going through and will go through (if they have the Heart), the same thoughts, who actually understand what I say. But this experience was another “learning” for me, and deepens my LOVE and RESPECT, not only for Yonah, but for ALL the other little ones, no matter who/what/where. (Now I wonder about the birds who come to the yard for their meals and noshes. I wonder what THEY “understand”. If nothing else, they KNOW where the food will be. A “fave resto”, as it were?)
Well... the day went along, more “Wint'ry” than much else. And there's a “faint promise” of “double-digit” temperatures for Saturday! What-ever, Yonah and I had another wonderful day together and tonight, we're warm, dry, toasty-cozy, plenty to eat and drink... and tomorrow? Well... tomorrow will be what it was when it finishes. For now, we wrap this day up, and I'm BLESSED!

Thursday 22 April:
Flurries again today... all through the day, now and again. “Flurries”. Well, I take comfort in that they weren't squalls or blizzards.
I passed the greater part of the day, in Yonah's room, working on getting photos together, photos of her. The more I work with them, the more I'm thinking of getting a proper “domain”, just for her, where I can put all the photos and maybe make some notes, documenting this experience for others... and as I worked, little Yonah was comfy in her house, in her room, in this old house here. A little bundle of LOVE, LIFE, GLORY... DIVINITY... the “BLESSING” that she truly is. Such BEAUTY. Such an amazing, AMAZING, ASTOUNDING little bit of LIFE!
Well, there's still time for us, together. My heart appreciates and yet, is heavy. Yes, indeed, my life and house will be empty when Yonah is “gone”. But... I brought her in to give her a place to heal so that she could get back to her life with the others. One day... one day...
Meanwhile, we close another day, she, in her room, in the safety and warmth of her room, her “house”, her own place... and me... yeah, well, and me... living each day for and because of her.

Friday 23 April:
The sun did manage to shine through the day, and Yonah and I spent the majority of it together as I re-worked yet another version of her “Photo Journal”. This time, the “manual slide” now presents the photos with a “double, white” border, on a glorious back-ground of a sun-set across the road... with a “textile” texture. In fact, I only JUST finished putting the links on, so that each photo will open in a new “tab”, full-size! Now, I have to see HOW I can manage to get her her own “URL”. I'm not pleased with the WP version after making modifications on it. The “theme” is for “cooking”, a restaurant, and just the thought of it as I worked made me ill (because, well, there are people who will shoot mourning doves for “food”... talk about senseless, ignorant, worthless). But it's not quite working well at all at present. So... And, there's “CSS” involved with the slide presentation and WP doesn't allow that. Well? If worse comes to worst, I may have to go “Tumblr”. But, at least Yonah has a “gmx” e-mail account now so there's that much to work with. And I managed to get her a phone number today too! Why? Well, because to me, she's an actual “entity”, and, with a URL, an e-mail account, I see no reason why she shouldn't have a phone number too. Who knows? Maybe she'll become a “go-to”, a “resource centre”... questions, answers... a source of all the information that I NEEDED SO DESPERATELY from the moment she came into my life but couldn't find! I STILL can't “let that go”; I was SO worried, wanted SO much to do ALL that I possibly could, had NO idea where to start, and ALL I wanted was to help her heal. And the ONLY “advice”, from “Bird People”: “put it in a shoe-box with some paper...” Yeah, well, these 6 months have been an education, and there does seem to be information “out there”... it's just scattered. Maybe I'll compile, and Yonah can become “THE authority”... “Mourning Dove Central”. We shall see what the future holds (for both of us). Whether she's here or not, the information that I'm acquiring is expanding... disseminating it is important. As mother said: An education is only good if it's passed along. Yonah will see to it, some-how, that others in need get the help.
Tomorrow? Nothing on the agenda other than more time with Yonah. And I'll try to see if she can get in and out of her house via the smaller door. I'd rather she use that one out-side to keep larger predators away. Hopefully she'll understand the little door, that it's an “exit” from her house, AND that it's the way to get back in to eat, AND, most importantly, that she'll be able to fly about, navigate the walls AND AVOID THE WINDOWS!
She gets one “odd blood feather” in her left wing that grows in an “off” sort of direction and when she removes it, because, it obviously bothers her, it bleeds a little. There's a bit of blood on her perch. I need to find information on that too... more research. I don't like the notion of her bleeding. I REALLY don't like the idea of an “open wound” ANY-WHERE on her! (So her managing to navigate the house with-out “collisions” is EXTREMELY IMPORTANT!)
Meanwhile, for today, tuck-in, a goo night of sleep and healthy rest. It was a bit of “OK”, weather-wise today. Tomorrow's not supposed to be “too bad”. I have to keep reminding me: It isn't “June” and May might not be much better than April. It's a matter of patience now and seeing who will manage to remain calm... me or Nature (or Yonah, who, so far, really doesn't seem to be too bothered by being here).
Until tomorrow...

Saturday 24 April:
Oh, this morning... “the call” came at 5.30, so I got up intending only to open Yonah's curtains and then going back to bed for a little while but... it didn't quite work that way and waters in the pool and drinking got changed and by the time I'd done with that, my coffee was on and, well... that's when we began a new day. (She didn't seem to mind at all. I suppose 5.30 is when she'd normally wake so, I'll learn to “adjust”. NO problem.)
When waters, house-keeping and coffee were done, I got right into working with photos... and today ALL THE PHOTOS ARE NOW ON A WP SERVER! If nothing else, I feel better that they're “backed-up” some-where not in the house. The next “adventure” will be trying to work the coding for a “presentation” or “album” of some sort. At this point, it's for me. As I work, I think of it as some place to “go to” when she's no longer in the house, and I can browse, remembering these months together. Maybe somebody else will stumble upon it, but no matter, really, it'll be a nice respite, a refuge, a place to go to to remember...
I DID manage though, to vet the coding for “page fades” and “refresh”. I used to be so good at all this “coding” for the internet, but so much has been changed over the years, and some of the “old” coding still works, while other “tags” and such no longer do. So I had to dig into the limited “library” that I have available, and jump about the internet looking for what I want. But now, with this coding, I can ACTUALLY MAKE A “CAROUSEL” EFFECT FOR THE PHOTOS! (Not on the WP blog, sadly, because they, WP, “parse-out” coding.) So now I'm SERIOUSLY considering a DOMAIN! I have the server space. I just need a domain name and... I'll have a lot... A LOT of page-building... at present, there are almost 300 photos, each one will need it's own page... BUT HEY! The coding is something I can do in Yonah's room! So THAT'S PERFECTLY WONDERFUL! I'M EXCITED NOW!
Meanwhile, tomorrow's weather is supposed to be more of “OK”, temperature-wise. But Sunday and Monday nights are... back down toward freezing! At least the house here isn't freezing, and Yonah's radiator keeps her room very nicely warm. There's NO reason she should have to be even the slightest bit “chilled”.
Poor little LOVE. She's probably as anxious to get out of here as I am to see her flying free again. I'll miss her... EXCRUCIATINGLY, but I DO want to see her FREE again!
So tonight, we both “close the house, close the day” and I look forward to HOURS with her tomorrow, and building her “presence” for the “international venue”. My MOST PRECIOUS, CHERISHED COMPANION, MY HEART! MY LOVE!

Sunday 25 April:
The skies were grey, the air was “cool” and damp today but... THERE ARE 300 CODED PAGES, READY FOR YONAH'S PHOTOS! WE'RE ON OUR WAY TO “INTERNET FAME”!!! I managed to “code-in” 50 photos too, today. 50 photos done, 250 to go... and, of course, I'll be taking MORE photos so... this could be another “never-ending” story. I'm looking forward to it. And if/when I get the domain, I'm thinking: add the information that I've been collecting on the care of/for mourning doves, in their own habitat and, for people like me, in the house. “How to re-hab”?
Today, I actually took “lunch” in the room with Yonah. I worked, took lunch, went back to work and we listened to the radio for a while and then to her “Play-list” of song-birds. It was a SUPER way to pass the day... WONDERFUL! SERIOUSLY!
And as we brought the day to a close, well, I checked the forecast and... tomorrow morning is expected to be ZERO... but with a “chill” of... MINUS FIVE! Oh well, at least Yonah's room will be comfy-warm and there's a LOT more work to be done on her “Photo Journal” so... time with Yonah, work for Yonah... it'll be a good day... a perfect day... we'll be together. I'll have the most “PERFECTEST” company!

Monday 26 April:

Another morning commencing at 5.30 today. I don't mind at all. In fact, I'm rather happy about it and honestly, it's a grand time to begin a day. (I used to start my days at 4.30... and I thoroughly enjoyed that, and these days, now, I actually have some “work” that I want to get to so, 5.30 it is... for as long as I can manage...)
It wasn't all that “warm” out-side today, so sitting with Yonah was perfectly fine. BUT... at noonish, I stepped out for a break (on the front porch, in the BRISK Northern wind) and when I came back into Yonah's room to pick-up on the work on the “Slide” presentation of her photos... SHE WAS IN HER POOL AGAIN!!! This one is the larger one so she's got more space to relax in and enjoy and really “get a good splash on”! OH! But it does my heart SO much good to see her enjoying that pool! All Winter I was thinking of how dry she must feel, since there's little humidity in the house with the heaters going. It was bothering ME, just the very thought. OK. In Winter, there really isn't much “running water” available out there. But she could have had the snow, at least. Well, now she has her own private POOL! AND, thankfully, I change the water in it every morning and every evening, so it was fresh and clean!
AND, today I managed to get ALL of the photos “coded-in” on the pages! They're complete and ready to ROLL! NOW... I'm working on an “Introduction” page and planning on working in a little “Blog”! (Which might just become a “Journal”... instead of little “notes” here and there, now and then, I'm keeping a Journal anyway... OK. So a Journal might be a lot of reading, but hey! Chances are I'll be the one to be reading it and it WILL give me comfort, reading, reminiscing. Not to mention, out time at hand is precious and there's this little lady, this little LIFE, this little BLESSING, and we're together ... now... )
AND, I DID manage to get down to the river today for fresh, natural, river-washed SAND! Fresh from the Winter snows and melts, the rush of crisp, clean, clear mountain water! Of course, I HAVE rinsed it thoroughly, just in case, and put it in the oven at 400°F for almost 2 hours. I let it heat and then let it cool in the oven so there's no chance of ANY sort of parasites or the likes in it. Tomorrow... we'll work with that. And, whilst at the river, I found three more rocks for the pool. Not sure if they'll fit in there and still leave enough room for a “swim”, but if they do, it brings more “Nature” into the “environment”. A bit of the “out-of-doors”...
Thankfully, it was, with little exception, one of those “Perfect” days... spent with my bestest little Friend. And this evening, we had another wonderful “chat” about the day. It's a pure delight, spending the last moments of dimming day-light, just sitting beside Yonah, talking, softly. And for the most part, she rests of her perch and stares at me, almost as if actually listening to my words. I look at here and I SO WISH I knew what she was thinking. And when I see her looking, so attentively, at me, I wish, even more, that I could tell her, in some way that she would understand, just how much she means to me. But, we have what we have. At least she's obviously not afraid of me. I'm guessing that, some-how, she DOES know how much LOVE I have for her and how much I want all “PERFECTION” for her, and to see her back with her flock. (I wonder if they've noticed that she's gone.)
I DID manage to spend ALL day in her room with her, working, quite assiduously, on her new “web presence”. It's coming along. The photo pages are ready to launch but I'm working on the “Welcome” and a “blog” collection of excerpts from my own journal where she's mentioned and her progress is recorded. THAT's proving to be quite involved since I have to read over the months recorded. But it's been such a delight being with her. It truly is. Ah... when she's no longer in the house... how empty it all will be.
And tomorrow, we'll do some “thorough house-keeping”... more time together.

A closing note: All was calm and settled, Yonah was safely tucked-in; at about 20.22 she gave a little “coo”. I wonder what happens when she does that when the house goes silent at night. Dreams? A sudden wakening and feeling alone? I really should get a cot for her room. I wonder if she'd feel comfortable if I were to sleep in there over-night. It breaks my heart to think that she feels lonely! But in another 3 weeks (hopefully), 4 at the most, she'll be out again and able to “mingle”. I'm so anxious to see how she handles it. I HOPE the flock welcomes her back!

Tuesday 27 April:

Oh... HOUSE-KEEPING, in earnest, today! Full-sweep, fresh waters, a new “rock” in the pool. It's OK but I need to keep looking for another, heavy but not large, yet, this one is making for a bit of a “splashing” sound in the “fountain” so we'll see what effect it has for Yonah, hearing moving water. And there's “river sand” in her house, a place to “bask”, since mourning doves tend to like sand or dry soil to rest in, soaking in the sun-shine. And fresh kitchen roll through-out the place and on her “loft”.
I ground more sun-flower seeds to make them easy to swallow, mixed new batches of “daily” and the “special” seeds with the sun-flower, and some of that “Fun” mix that has little fruits and veggies in it. Good food. Lots of vitamins and minerals and necessities. Healthy stuff!
When all was “settled” again, the “splashing” of the “fountain” made for a “calming” sort of sound... like a little brook. Yes indeed... we're turning the room into a little “get-away”... like a “walk in the woods”. It's lovely!
Oh, and another batch of sand went into the oven... 400°F for an hour, and then I left it in there to cool on it's own... slowly. “Back-up”.
I managed to get Yonah's photo pages onto a server, under my own “Design” site. There's a bit more work to be done on them, but it gives me more challenge, and I welcome that. It also gives me more work to do... and time to spend with Yonah because I do all the work in her room, with her, and that's a BLESSING... INDEED!
I've been looking for a “domain name”, specifically for Yonah... working with “Yonah Taube”. I tried just “yonah” but that appears to be taken, but some kid. So I need something with her name and... “Yonah” is “dove”, in Hebrew... “Taube” is “dove”, in German. And the two, together, actually CAN be a name... it sounds good... I'm thinking... indeed, I am.
It was a wonderful day, all told, today. And the sun DID manage to break through, dispelled the “cold”. And so much work got done on the coding of the photo pages. But honestly, I look forward to Yonah leaving to return to her flock.
Tomorrow is expected to be “warm” but RAIN! And... I need to think of something better to use to block the light from the street-light in that room. The card-board works but I'd like to get something better, something that isn't so... well... “scrap”. (Of course, I'll be doing the thinking and planning and such with “supervision”... MORE TIME WITH YONAH!

Wednesday 28 April:

YONAHTAUBE.COM - LAUNCHED AT 19.00 (and there's a LOT of work left to be done)

9.30 YONAHTAUBE.COM IS REGISTRED!!!
There's still quite a bit of work to be done on the 300 pages of “photos” for the “Portfolio” BUT... NOT ONLY IS “YONAHTAUBE.COM” *** LAUNCHED *** SHE HAS A FUNCTIONING “FAVICON” AND A TEMPORARY HOME-SCREEN WITH AN ANIMATION OF HER (THAT I CREATED IN DECEMBER '20)! AND I MANAGED TO SPEND ANOTHER ENTIRE DAY WITH YONAH TODAY! SO... YONAH AND HER STORY WILL BE ON THE INTERNET... FOR AT LEAST ANOTHER YEAR... MORE, IF I CAN GET THE MONEY TO STRETCH IT ALL... I'D LIKE ANOTHER 10 YEARS! WE'LL WORK ON IT... LITTLE BY LITTLE. HER LEGACY WILL LIVE ON! And I'm LOVING this work... especially since I get to do it all in HER room, with HER company! HEY! THE SITE IS UP, RUNNING... THE “PHOTO JOURNAL/PORTFOLIO” IS LIVE AND ACCESSIBLE AROUND THE WORLD! *YONAH*!!!
I worked on “cleaning-up” the coding all day with her as Supervisor and THAT is REALLY what matters most to me of ALL... TIME WITH YONAH! (Oh... one of these days... how empty this house and my existence will be when she's returned to her “rightful place” in the world. But, we'll have had these months... and I'll just hope that she'll have some recollection of them... with some “fondness”.)
And tonight, she's settled in her little house, quite unaware of all that's been done. I stepped to the door of her darkened room and, as I do every night, I whispered “Good night. I LOVE you!” Nobody will ever know how TRUE that is...
What a day... what a day... what a day!

Thursday 29 April:
What can I say? It was another “comfortably cool” day (as opposed to “cold”), but just grey and a touch on the “damp” side. But it was perfect for all the work that had to be done... Yonah's site is up and live, on-line, but there's still “tweaking” and “cleaning of coding”... 300 pages! And each page has a photo associated with it. Oh yes, indeed... And as I'm working on that I'm thinking of changes, and seriously considering changing the “Blog” segment to a “Journal”. There have been SO many “developments”, SO many BEAUTIFUL EXPERIENCES... SO MUCH LEARNING along the way, over these 6 months! And each day, each new lesson, each bit of information that I've had to search and search for. The primary thought is that I could (should?) turn Yonah's site into a repository of all the information and learning I've acquired, so that SHE will be THE “Teacher” for others who, for what-ever reason, find themselves in the company of a dove... mourning or other-wise. I'm finding information that contradicts my own experiences, as well as information that has proven to be SO helpful. The problem is that it's all so “fragmented”. And as I work along, thinking, I remember the 13th of October, looking for help, advice and support. Directed to somebody local who claims to be “SO KNOWLEDGEABLE” and is considered, obviously, by others to be, as they call it “Bird People”, somebody who boasts about working with the “Audubon”, with so much interest in birds, especially in the area. Ah... but who doesn't have a bird in his life, his home. And the “sagely advice”... resignation and defeat. “Put it in a shoe-box... for what-ever time...” Hopelessness! And today, as I type these words, that “hopeless” little LIFE is here, very much... VERY MUCH ALIVE AND WELL, looking better that ever. Clean, healthy, comfortable, an ABSOLUTE DELIGHT... A BLESSING! So yes, there's a LOT Yonah and I can give to the rest of the world... so maybe THIS is why I've been “moved” to put her and her legacy on-line. OK, there probably aren't all that many “out there” looking for all of this information. But even if there's only ONE... ONE other person, ONE other mourning dove... at least we can reach them, and give them Hope, encouragement, support. And it will become part of the *Legacy* that is now... YONAH TAUBE.
At day's close, Yonah and I had a half hour of “Evening Chat”, discussed the rainy weather, the particulars of her web-site, keeping one-another company. I spoke, she stared until I noticed her little eyes beginning to close. She's actually so comfortable with my presence and the sound of my voice... it's a GRAND HONOUR... TRULY, THE GRANDEST HONOUR! And so, her curtains closed, I've put another bit of card-board on the top of her house at night, to block more of the light that crashes into the house from the un-necessary street light out-side. So now, we block the on-coming head-lights (of which, really, there aren't many... after all, we're really not a “destination” here, nor are we actually on the way to or from anywhere of any particular interest, still, I don't want any sudden “flashes in the dark” to disturb a night's sleep), AND the artificial light that “people”, in their obvious inferiority, so need. (Yeah, I suppose I AM just a touch “bitter” about the situation, but, if Yonah were out in the world, in the “wild”, she'd be able to find a nice place of comfort some-where; but here, now, she's got this room and that covers it all... so I'm obligated to provide the necessary comforts... and I do so with LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!)
And tomorrow? Well... More of the same... How wonderful... How WONDERFUL!

Friday 30 April:
Oh, but it was an early start to the day. But 7.00 I was already at the work table, with Yonah, of course. There was work to be done on her “web-site”! And “Mother Nature” was making “work at home” easier with “overcast and damp”. But, in the company of my DEAREST COMPANION, what-ever was out-side our window was of no concern. We had each-other and all was well with the world... as it is at such times.
The “news” today: Yonah now has e-mail! Oh yes, indeed... “yonah @ gmx.com” and her name is officially in the “reply”... “Yonah Tauber”. If/when anybody wants to respond to or comment on... or ask questions, they'll be addressed directly to her and answered BY her! What a little “CELEB”! (I doubt there's another dove, mourning, turtle or other-wise, with such credentials. But, this little one is more than deserving and though surely there are those who might question the sanity, well, that's easily understood... they've never actually MET this MOST AMAZING little survivor. And me? I couldn't be more proud of her.)
Now, really, all that remains is to get her back to her flock, back to her intended LIFE... in the open spaces of these woods, these mountains, where she can fly with-out walls and windows, “chat” with her peers, soar on breezes, bask in open sun-shine, drink from the clean, clean mountain streams... find a mate, raise a family.
The wind this evening though... it BLASTED AGAINST THE HOUSE FOR OVER AN HOUR... STEADILY! All sorts of “things and stuff” were FLYING past Yonah's windows as we had our “Evening Chat”! And the “threat” is another drop in temperatures... to MINUS 1°! As we chatted, I said, to Yonah:
“We've been through worse, MUCH worse than this, this past winter. Winds were horrid. The temperatures were bitter-cold and the snows and ice were shipped and beaten. We made it through that... we'll get through this too.”
And we WILL... It's April... there IS better, warmer time to come. (I just need to be patient...difficult as it is to be patient.)
Tonight though, I keep noticing the feathers on her injured wing. The “damage” has healed very nicely, no “infections”, no signs of any sort of “wounds” other than a bit of “scarring”. But there are feathers that aren't growing-in as they should... they're a bit “off”. They appear to be “healthy” but they don't conform with the others. And Yonah picks at them often. I SO wish I knew what to do about them... and, even now, all these months later, I search for an answer, or a suggestion, and I find nothing. There are mentions of “pulling” them. But I don't want to inflict any more pain than she's already managed through. And I DON'T want her to associate me with ANY suffering or discomfort. It's taken me all this time to simply gain her trust when I'm in the same room! The very LAST thing, no, I just, all-too-simply will NOT do anything to diminish that trust. I'll just have to “wait and see”. I just worry, so deeply and sincerely, that, when the time comes and she gets to be out-side, that she won't be able to fly properly, to travel distance... won't be able to take flight quickly enough to dodge predators! And what makes THAT fear all the worse is that, this after-noon, I went out to add to the seeds for the birds in the yard and something had actually taken the one feeder right off the hook! And there were FEATHERS ON THE GROUND! I do NOT need to see that! Especially NOT now!
I AM considering an “alternative”... in the event (may the gods forbid) that Yonah won't be able to get back out, safely. She has a nice “cage” now, with quite a bit of space to move about. She can “fly” just a bit... well... she can exercise her wings in it. BUT... if she's to actually stay (and I will NOT just “toss” her out to the world unless she's able to survive), I don't know that she “needs” but I WANT her to have MORE space, some place she can actually stretch, spread and USE her wings in! I don't see her “confined” to what-ever it is. If she's to stay for her duration, she'll HAVE to learn to navigate the entire house. I will NOT have her “caged”... She's NOT a “pet”, wasn't then, isn't now and, in my heart, she NEVER WILL BE! She's a “wild” bird, no matter what circumstances may deal us. And she WILL have full use of the entire house! Still, I'd like her to have “her own place”... in her own room, a place where she can “roost” at night, in comfort and safety, a place where she has her “pool”, her food and drinking water... a specific place of her own. To that end, I've started looking... and what I'm seeing is a step out of and away from “bird cages”... There are “dog crates”... I've seen them, in the stores. I've seen them in peoples' houses... with dogs in them. They're large, open, airy, let in a LOT of light, and aren't nearly as “confining” as “bird cages”. And the spacing in the “bars” is such that I doubt Yonah would fit through them. And I doubt she'd even try such a thing. I saw one, “48x32x30” inches... not terribly expensive. I could certainly fit it in her room, even now. I don't like the idea of her being taken from her birth-right, but... if she can't escape danger. I DO want to see her back with her flocks, “living as she should”... and I suppose that would include all the dangers. But, she's pulled through these 6 months of being in a house, in the company of a human... she's pulled through the trauma of being attacked; “throwing her into the fray” now would be... well... heartless. I'll be thinking, and re-thinking... and we'll see how it turns out. If she can, she'll fly free. If she can't... I'll do EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING I MUST TO MAKE THE REST OF HER LIFE AS CARE-FREE AS I HUMANLY-POSSIBLY CAN! And I'll HOPE she doesn't come to resent me for it.
And so, tonight, I stepped out of the house for a moment... the winds are still blowing, though not as hard as before, and they're coming directly from the North... and yes... they're COLD! There was, earlier, an “ice storm” in the forecast for this evening. Thankfully, that didn't happen. But is IS COLD out there again! Yonah's radiator is on for the night... just in case. And to think: tomorrow is the first day of MAY! THIS is NOT how I saw these seasons going. But, as I said: We've been through a lot worse... we'll make it through these last days of Winter.
There's a LOT on the agenda for tomorrow... I want to make certain that Yonah's site is “perfectly presentable” and I have to think of ways to “announce” it. And if this weather doesn't make any sort of improvements? Well... tomorrow will be a new day... a new month... with a new “Companion”... She'll always be “new”... especially since she's always changing, doing something different... and I'm always learning from her.